How to Parent with Intention (Even When It’s Hard)

Parenting with intention means making thoughtful choices that align with your values, even in challenging situations. Many parents dream about their children's future before they’re born, but what happens when your child isn’t what you imagined? Discover how intentional parenting can help you raise resilient, happy, and emotionally healthy children, no matter the obstacles. 

Key Influences That Shape Parenting Styles

Our childhood experiences shape how we parent. For example, a critical parent may inspire us to be gentler, while a lack of structure may prompt us to set firmer boundaries. Other influences include our child’s traits, social networks, and cultural background. Reflecting on these influences clarifies why intentional parenting can be a challenging endeavor.

What Makes Parenting Easy or Hard?

As a therapist who has worked with children from ages 13-17, I have heard many statements made about how difficult it can be to parent a child. Parents who are trying to parent intentionally often share that they’ve experienced no success, despite reading numerous books and watching countless videos. However, what makes parenting easy or hard is our approach to the emotions and behaviors presented to us. It’s essential to remember that with every interaction you have with your child, you will have a choice. Will you be more strict, laid back, or a blend of both? Do emotions overwhelm or exhaust you? Is there a capacity to tolerate emotions that you may not be able to resolve quickly? The intentional part of parenting starts with acknowledging your own emotions and behaviors. Recognizing this leads us naturally to consider ways to intentionally shift our patterns for better outcomes.

Intentional Parenting Tips: Small Shifts for Big Growth

Some parents may already feel comfortable with intentional parenting because their upbringing modeled positive behaviors. If you find it challenging, here are three effective tips on how to parent with intention—even when it’s hard. These strategies can help you foster stronger bonds and support your child’s emotional development. 

Understand Your Emotional Triggers as a Parent

Ask yourself why certain emotional expressions in your child trigger strong reactions. Do you see sadness and tears as weakness? Does anger feel like disrespect? Reflecting on your beliefs about emotions can help you respond to your child in healthier, more supportive ways. This self-awareness is key for intentional parenting and raising emotionally intelligent kids. 

Set Realistic Expectations for Your Children

Many parents have high hopes for their children’s achievements, but unrealistic expectations can lead to stress and lower self-esteem. Focus on your child’s current capabilities and provide support instead of criticism. By aligning your expectations with your child’s unique needs, you encourage personal growth and academic success.

Embrace Mistakes as Learning Opportunities

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting. Mistakes are inevitable, but they are valuable lessons for both parents and children. Embrace setbacks as opportunities to reassess, adapt, and grow. By modeling resilience and flexibility, you teach your child important life skills and show that growth is a lifelong journey. 


Are you ready to parent from a place of intention and peace?